When dealing with others today, consider the emotional bank account. Even if we do not know the person, (which makes it easier because we are not starting with a negative balance) we can make the first step by making deposits right off the bat!
Here a few things to consider if things are starting to south in relationships or encounters with others.
- Big problems usually are a sum of a bunch of little problems. Remember lingchi, the relationship may be on its 999th cut. One more can be the death of it. To dig deep and discover the many cuts you will have to have an hansei session, look at your emotional bank account, and apply the “five whys” to peel back layers of mistakes.
- Both parties need to make deposits. Thinking ahead can often give you insight on what is to come. The closer you become in a relationship, the more you’ll know what can make them happy. But be careful, the more expectation grows on both sides to know what to do too. So it’s going to cost you a little more to make that deposit.
- Acceptance. There has to be a level of acceptance to things that cannot be changed in a person for it to work. If there seems to be a little quirk about the person that is going to be a deal breaker, have the hard conversation and be upfront because we only delay the inevitable by pretending something is okay when it’s not. The small things you were able to look over before will not cut it now.
Making generous deposits are really smart investments into your own happiness and future in the relationships with others!